I have no words.

Or they’ll see stuff like this.

Once again, I must commend the great nation of Japan. That looks like a ridiculous sport, yes, but at least their kids are active enough to play sports. Plus, they can also do math. And science. Also, music. 

Also, the American education system might be in need of some reform. 

Read the carefully researched piece of journalism here: “Police scramble to snare escaped papier mâché rhino at Japanese zoo.”

Oh, Japan. What would we ever do without you?

“Did you say Jeremy Lin? They won?”

Yes. And yes, 90 to 87.

“I was at Madison Square Garden the day they played the Nets. I put him in my fantasy basketball team that night. That night.”

“He’s been talking about it all evening.” His date said, with a really understanding look for someone whose boyfriend was obviously slightly preoccupied on Valentine’s Day.

After last night’s down-to-the-wire win, Lin now has the highest total score for the first five starting games of any NBA player in history. Talk about building up a fan expectations.

“Jeremy Lin and Landry Fields of the New York Knicks may comprise the most intelligent starting backcourt in NBA history….So it’s not surprising when Lin and Fields unveiled what has to be the nerdiest pre-game handshake in league history. The choreographed skit features the two skimming through an imaginary book, taking off their glasses and then placing them inside pocket protectors.” Mercury News

Watch the video here. Sound’s not necessary, so feel free to click in class.

However, I am Asian-American, and I do love a good story. The Jeremy Lin phenomenon (“Linsanity”) is captivating, not only because the man has become a hero for Asian Americans, but also because his underdog story has given casual fans like me a reason to watch basketball again. 

In case you’ve been living under a rock, or if you’ve actually been doing your reading instead of watching basketball and then writing about it on the internet, here’s a quick primer on Lin’s sudden ascent, courtesy of the NY Times. 

And here’s a short recap, if you’re too lazy to read the Times piece:

Hope all of you kids had a wonderful non-denominational holiday break and that at least 65% of you survived the arrival of fall semester grades. 

Here’s a video to watch when you’re finished with class. Yeah. That’s right. I see you looking at the Law Weekly during class, endlessly refreshing to see if there’s anything—anything—new for you to read instead of paying attention to your professor’s really important lecture on FRCP inconsistencies.

…and then the giant basketball found his keys, and now all the men in my classes are spiritually fulfilled.